5 Everyday Sins That Stunt Spiritual Growth

When many of us think of sin, we think of big things: murder, adultery, perhaps idol worship. In our own minds we rank those sins up there as the big dogs. Unfortunately, when we make this type of distinction, we actually desensitize ourselves to the reality that we sin everyday in many different ways. Each of these sins are real sins which contain the power to separate us eternally from a holy God and required the sending of Jesus to sacrificially atone for at the cross. These sins, when not dealt with, can stunt the growth of a Christian, and will stand to condemn the unbeliever. 

In this post I want to highlight 5 common, everyday sins we need to be aware of, begin to identify in our lives, and repent from. 

1. Worry -- Everyone has worried at some point. Some people live in constant worry. Worry is a sin. At the root of worry is unbelief in the reality that God cares for His children and provides for them. Jesus speaks of this in Matthew 6 when he teaches that God sovereignly cares for the birds of the air, feeding them, and aware of their livelihood. He then concludes by asking, "How much more valuable are you than the birds?" Jesus' argument is that worry is silly. First, your God is sovereign over everything, including your life. He even knows the number of hairs on your head. Second, worry is the result of not knowing something or not being in control of something. When we recognize we are not in control of something, it can produce worry; however, this is where faith should be present. We should put our faith in the Lord, who knows all things and rules with power over them.

Confess that you are a worrier, admit that it is sin against God, and repent from worrying by placing complete trust of your life in God's hands, knowing He is good, wise, and powerful.

2. Loose Lips -- What do I mean by loose lips? A number of sins can emerge from loose lips: gossiping about others, slander, lying, and angry outbursts. All of these are examples of sins that flow from loose lips. James 3:5-6 speaks of the tongue being able to set fires. This is metaphoric for the great damage the tongue can do when not tamed. If we do not learn to tame our tongue, it can damage relationships, cause us trouble when angrily lash out at people, or lead us to lie our way out of accountability for things we have said or done. Many things on a daily basis come out of our mouths that are not glorifying to God or encouraging to people around us.

Confess that your mouth causes you problems, admit that it is sin against God, and repent by watching closely what things you speak and in what manner you speak them. Train yourself to ask the question: would I say this if Jesus were present with me in this room? (By the way, he is.)

3. Poor Stewardship -- This issue, like the last one, has multiple components that may be present. Poor stewardship is our mismanagement of all that God has given us. This manifest itself through mismanagement of our money, time, resources, and spiritual gifts. This may look like wasteful spending. It could look like failure to serve God with your gifts and talents. It may be failure to tithe your money to a local church as Scripture outlines. Or it could manifest itself in laziness. Maybe you complain about wanting to spend more time in the Word or prayer, but you waste countless hours on Facebook, Twitter, or Pintrest. Jesus tells the parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30) to remind us that he who manages well what he has been given, will be given more. Those who waste and squander will have what they've been given taken away. 

Confess that you have been guilty of poor stewardship, admit that it is sin against God, and repent by evaluating all the areas you have been given to steward (time, money, gifts, resources) and make the changes needed in these areas to bring them into alignment with God's will and Word.

4. Unforgiving -- Many sin daily by holding grudges against people and failing to forgive. Not forgiving others who have hurt us is sinful. Why? Because those who have been forgiving infinitely more by God Almighty, have no grounds or right to withhold forgiveness from others. No matter how wronged you have been, you still have not been sinned against the way each of us have sinned against a holy and perfect God. In fact, Jesus says in Matthew 18 if we fail to forgive others, we will not be forgiven. It is that big of a deal. Many think forgiveness means reconciliation, but it is not (more about this here).  

Confess that you struggle with being unforgiving, admit that it is sin against God, and repent by taking your struggle to forgive to God, ask God to be your vindicator, and release the person or people who have hurt you by choosing to no longer let their actions hurt and define you. 

5. Lack of self-control -- One of the fruits of the spirit is self-control. This is not talked about a lot in church. There are not many books written on this subject. However, self-control or lack of it, is at the heart of many struggles people face. Whether it is our eating habits, exercise routines, how we dress, the way we represent ourselves on the internet, or many other issues, self-control is often at the heart of whether we're honoring God or sinning. Self-control helps us to be slow to act. It aides us from having to immediately give our opinion or saying things we will later regret. Self-control is important in a marriage. If there is a lack of self-control with one or both people, it can cause serious problems. This issue plays out in different ways with different people. 

Confess that you need more self-control, admit that it is sin against God, and repent by beginning to lean more heavily on the grace that God supplies when we seek Him in prayer for help in this area. Rely on the Spirit's power, available to all believers, to begin operating with more self-control in your life.

With all of these everyday sins, it can be helpful to enlist the help of a friend or loved one that can offer accountability and ask hard questions. With the grace of God, the forgiveness Christ offers, and the Spirit's power, we can labor to rid our lives of these issues. I believe our lives would look very different, and our spiritual growth would be noticeable, if we dealt with these common issues. I invite you to join me in making these issues a priority. 

This list is not exhaustive. If you can think of other everyday sins that you or others struggle with, list them in the comments below. 

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5 Ideas for Using Accountability

The idea of accountability has always been prominent with Christians. Many have been for it and some against it. Those against it claim that accountability is pointless because people can still, and will, lie about their actions. While this can be true, it does not mean that accountability is unsuccessful in helping people walk according to the Scriptures. Those for accountability argue that is both biblical and necessary for healthy Christian growth. 

Accountability is all about growing with others. Discipleship is best lived out with others. It is in close community that we take the largest strides of growth in our faith. When accountability is working properly, it deters sin, keeps us disciplined, promotes humility, and concerns us about the growth of other believers. Having accountability through one-on-one, two-to-three, or small group relationships are more valuable to your growth in grace than you can comprehend. So here are ways you can use accountability to become a well-rounded Christian. 

5 Ideas for Using Accountability

 1. Quite time accountability. Accountability partners can help you be faithful to spend time with God. It is vital that we spend daily time in the Word and prayer. This is not for the super-spiritual alone, it should be the goal of every Christian. We need the wisdom of God's Word to guide us. We need the daily dose of humility that prayer provides. The act of prayer is an act of recognizing your own insufficiency. Prayer humbles us before God to recognize our need for Him and His ability above all others to provide for us. I have written about how I spend time with God if you would like more instruction on this area.

Accountability Ideas:

** Find 1 or 2 people who serve as accountability for this area of your life.
** Check on each other daily using tools like a phone call, a text, twitter, Facebook, or email.
** Share with each other what time of the day you are setting as your quite time with God, and commit to texting (or any another method) each other prior to those committed times to encourage them to follow through with their appointment with God.


2. Battling Sin. There may not be a greater need for accountability than in the area of battling sin. The ancients would call this practice the mortification of sin. If we do not commit to killing sin, sin will be killing us. James 5:16 exhorts us to "Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another..." This is not a suggestion, but a command from God's Word. Why do we need this kind of accountability? Because sin that remains in the dark gains power, dominion, and strength. Sin grows stronger and more dominant in our lives when it is covered up and hidden. However, when sin is exposed, and we talk about our struggles by letting others in to our battles, sin loses both its power and appeal. 

This is why we desperately need others to help us battle sin. Practically speaking, accountability in this area gives others a chance to speak truth into our lives, pray for us, and encourage us as we fight the good fight. Instead of wallowing in our sinful failures, challenge each other to confess and repent of sin, turn to Scripture to find tools to combat particular sins, and pray for each other. 

Accountability Ideas: 

** Have a person (you can have more than one, but not too many) you can meet weekly to share your sin struggles with.
** Meet for coffee or lunch with your accountability partner. Another option is a phone call on the way to work or during a lunch break during the week. You could even do a Skype or FaceTime conversation during a time you are both available. 
** In instances where a persistent sin continues to remain in a person's life, commit to reading a book together on the subject, memorize Scripture on the issue, or go together to meet with a pastor/elder for further counsel. 


3. Faithfulness to our home responsibilities. If you are married, then you have home responsibilities. Every man and woman has God-given roles they are called to fulfill. These home responsibilities include being a parent. So if you are a man who is married and has any children, you have many responsibilities. You are called to lead your family. This includes leading your wife spiritually. You must ensure she is growing in her relationship with Christ. You must also lead your children. This involves one-on-one discipleship with your kids, as well as family worship. I know so many families who want to have family worship, but do not. These responsibilities are where good accountability partners can come in handy. 

Accountability Ideas:

** Have an accountability partner check with you weekly to ask if you are leading family worship. Set a day that you plan to lead family worship and have your accountability parter check to ensure you have prepared for it.

** Ask your accountability partner to check regularly if you are: 1. praying with your spouse, 2. praying for your spouse, and 3. talking to them about what they are currently learning in their walk with God, and 4. what they are currently struggling with. 
4. Faithfulness to our church responsibilities. If you are a believer, you should be committed to a local church. There is no such concept as a churchless Christian in the New Testament. Christians are saved from our sins and saved into a community. Inside this community every person has a role. We are all given spiritual gifts by the Holy Spirit for the purpose of building up and edifying the church. As a committed church member you should be giving financially, in some type of group outside of Sunday mornings, serving with your gifts, and attending Sunday worship gatherings weekly.

Accountability Ideas: 

** Have your accountability partner ask you about: church attendance, serving, being in a group, participation in the life of the church, giving, etc. 

** Join with your accountability partner for regular prayer for the church, its leaders, its members, and its mission.

5. Gauging our Affections. This may be one of the most neglected areas of for Christian accountability. It is no problem to have someone ask us about what we are doing. But this area of accountability, gauging our affections, gets to the heart of how we are feeling. Are we growing in our love for Jesus? Are we finding our prayer times fervent and alive? When we sing praises do our hearts leap? When we read the Scriptures are we hungry for more? The affections can go through seasons of great fire and intensity, then go through seasons of cold and staleness. This is an area of our walks with God that would be well served to have accountability.

Accountability Ideas:

** Invite your accountability partner to ask regularly the following questions: how is your life for Jesus? What is your eagerness to read the Word and pray? How do you feel as you are reading the Word and praying? Do you anticipate gathering to worship with the church? Do you enjoy your time with God? If you were to evaluate your hearts affections right now, would you rank them as: hot, cold, or lukewarm?

Concluding Thoughts & Challenge

If you are attempting to live the Christian life in isolation from others, you are doomed to fail. If you believe you can get by without accountability, you are attempting a futile feat. You need others. You were made to walk with others. Accountability is a gift from God. Without it we are prone to wander and stray from God. With it we can fulfill our God-given callings and responsibilities. 

Question: Who are the first people that came to your mind as potential accountability partners while you read this post? My challenge to you is to send this article to them, ask them to read it, and then invite them to join you in an accountability relationship. 

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No Perfect People Allowed

The church is not for perfect people. The church is a gathering of imperfect people who have put their hope in a perfect Savior, Jesus. We all know in our minds this is true, but we often live differently.

In recent weeks, I have had a number of conversations with members and attenders of The Journey Church, which I pastor, who had not been around lately. In talking with them, I learned that these people had been experiencing various trials and pains in their lives. Some were struggling with areas of sin in their lives. Whether it was the experience of trials or struggles with sin, all the people felt inclined not to come to gather with the church for worship. This concerns me.

The first thing I wanted to know was whether their non-attendance was because they felt uncared for or judged by the church. In all cases the answer was "no." When I probed deeper into why these people felt the need to shy away from gathering with the church, it was a sense of guilt, shame, or lack of desire to be with people that emerged. They simply did not want to face other people. They reiterated that this was not because the church had done anything, but their own sense of guilt.

So what is behind their not coming?

This really got me to thinking about the paradigm that exists in most people's minds about the church. Many people view the church as a place where people have it together. One reason is many of our churches have turned into impersonal gatherings where we attend a service, say a few words to the people around us, and leave. There is very little interaction, so we all put on our happy faces. In this kind of setting, we do not let our guards down. We all put on a smile, look good, keep composed, and give our hour and a half of time.

The problem with this is that it gives the perception to everyone around us that our lives are great. Things are perfect. When this permeates the culture, even when things are not perfect, people will feel the need to fake it. In an environment like this, we send a message that struggles and pain are an inconvenience. When this is happening, people who are struggling with trials or sin, would rather not be in an environment that feels inherently judgmental or critical.

A Second Reason

So we see that one reason people may shy away from coming to church is that they do not feel that people facing problems are welcome to come. The illusion of perfection as a requirement keeps them away. A second reason, which is similar to the first, is many people choose not to gather with the church during seasons of struggle, is they do not want to "fake it." They feel conviction; they feel shame for their sin. Many simply don't feel worthy to come to church.

The reason this problem exists is two-fold. The first reason is that people forget that the church is a place full of imperfect people. If we realized that everyone is jacked up, we would have much more confidence in gathering with the body. The church is the body of Christ, made up of sinners who have been saved by grace. Our whole message as the church is that we are imperfect people serving a perfect Savior. People forget that Christ has forgiven them of their sin. They forget that there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1). There is no need to self-impose condemnation. If we realized this, we would gather freely with the body, even in the midst of struggles and sin.

The second part of this is that many church worship services are too chipper. What do I mean by this? I mean that many church services are too focused on being peppy and happy and chipper. While I am not against uplifting services, the reality is most people are not always feeling uplifted. If we read the psalms we see quickly that being downcast is normal for even the most God-loving people. Sorrow is a real part of the Christian life. Unfortunately, our services rarely reflect the lament and sorrow that accompany our lives. If our services were more intentional to reflect the different dispositions that many in the church feel, I believe we would have more people continue to gather with the body, even when they were downcast from trials or sin. 

The Bottom Line

The bottom line is this: church is not for perfect people. The church is a gathering of imperfect people, who have put their hope in a perfect Savior. If you are having struggles in life, you should gather with the body of Christ. If you are struggling with issues of sin, welcome, so are those gathered around you. Seek the Savior with other believers when the church gathers. Do not create an unreachable standard of perfection that is required before gathering for corporate worship. If you do, you are perpetuating the problem of making church a place for the supposed perfect people.


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Spiritual Slumps

Sports fans are accustomed to hearing about slumps. Basketball players have shooting slumps. Baseball players have hitting slumps. A slump for them is a season of time in which they have a difficult time making a shot or getting a hit. 

Slumps are common in sports. It is unrealistic to think you can constantly make shots or get hits. So when players go through this, we often here the antidote prescribed, "they need to shoot their way out of the slump" or "they need to keep swinging the bat until they hit their way out of the slump." 

The idea is that they need to keep going through the habits and routines of their craft, be it shooting a basketball or hitting a baseball, until they get out of the slump. 

In the Christian life, we also experience slumps. It is not uncommon for us to go through spiritual slumps. During these times our relationship with God feels stagnant, stifled, and unproductive. These seasons can make it difficult to pray, read the Bible, or gather with the church in corporate worship.

So how do we get out of these slumps? Is there an antidote for overcoming these times?

The same advice given to sports players would be my advice for getting out of a spiritual slump. You need to "hit" your way out of it. You need to "shoot" yourself out of these slumps. What do I mean? You need to keep going through the habits and routines of our spiritual disciplines, until we get out of the slump. 

The greatest thing we can do during our spiritual slumps is start pouring ourselves into the Word of God. We need to read and reflect and rejoice at God in His Word. We need to pray. Pray without ceasing and with a fervency that God would awaken our cold hearts to Him. We need to gather with the church for worship. We need to be singing the praises of God and hearing sermons from the Bible. 

James 4:8 tells us "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you..."

The promise of this verse is that if we will make a move toward God, He will make a move toward us. If we are in a spiritual slump, the antidote is to run hard after God. God is not elusive, He is not hiding from us. 

So if you are currently in a spiritual slump, or soon find you are, shoot your way out through prayer and Scripture reading until you are out. 

Question: how often do you find yourself in spiritual slumps? What things have you found helpful for getting out of them?